Date: 2009-11-30 20:11 Subject: Posted using TxtLJ Security: Public

Im so disgusted by the amt of food on this guys side of table. Im so grossed out. Im drinking orange juice

Date: 2009-11-10 08:43 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

188 this morning.

down two pounds.

Date: 2009-11-09 10:53 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

I moved out of my parents house.

I live on my own.

I have no excuses now.

No family dinners.
No one watching me.

freedom.

ITS TIME.

I was just going through my old laptop from when I was at my skinniest and my pictures are fabulous.

Its weird, everytime I go through these phases, my body looks so different.

who dares me to go as skinny as ever before?

Date: 2009-09-25 11:06 Subject: Posted using TxtLJ Security: Public

Just had an amazing workout. Im plateauing again so i needed to step it up. I planned before i went which worked well.

Date: 2009-09-24 07:04 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

I've been doing pretty well latley. I broke my stupid 190 plateau.

The other morning I was 188.
Yesterday I didn't weight because I woke up 2 hours late and had to fly to work.
This morning I woke up in a hotel room next to a man then went straight to the gym.

I feel fat today though.

I am not letting myself eat today. I had too many calories yesterday.

I hate dinner at my gmas.

Yesterday--
*salad of iceberg lettuce, 2 tomato slices onion and feta and 30 cals of dressing. (lunch)
*1 cup of coselaw (dinner)
*1/4 cup of corn (dinner)
*1 cup of rice (dinner)
*1" of pie-- literally, a cubic inch. (dessert)
and if THAT wasnt bad enough, I also had:
*a banana
*2 oatmeal raisin cookies
*a peanut butter and jelly
*cereal

But I did go to the gym and burned EXTRA cals.

Date: 2009-09-22 12:35 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

Finally down to 188 today.

I worked out twice yesterday, burning over 800 calories.
I had a splenda applesauce, a small salad of iceberg lettuce, onion, and feta cheese, and 2 apples. Also, 5 extreme lean pills.

I already worked out today, burning 300+
I ate roasted veggies.
Broccoli, onion, tomato, and green peppers, sprayed with Pam and tossed in seasoning. and a small apple.

Im working out tonight after work again.

I love the guy that works at my gym. mmm.

Date: 2009-09-21 16:34 Subject: Posted using TxtLJ Security: Public

Burned 400 at the gym so far today. Going again tonight after work. I love workout weeks.

Date: 2009-09-19 07:29 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

I have completley plateaued at 189-190 for the past week. I can't stand it.

Tonight is my last night with my son this week, then its gym week again!!

Gym weeks are when I starve myself (or eat under 200 cals a day) and work my ASS off at the gym for hours and hours. I usually lose a lot of weight. theres NO WAY I can plateau anymore after that week.

Starts tomorrow at 3.

Kara beat me in our weight loss challenge of the week. She lost 2.4 I only lost 2.8. I'm just glad we both lost over 2 pounds. I feel like I have to lose over 2 pounds a week because thats what is a healthy range of weight loss.

My boss is buying pizza for all of us today since we won best salon in detroit. I will not eat any.

Does anyone know some good consequences besides cutting for if I go over my calorie limit?

Date: 2009-09-17 15:19 Subject: Posted using TxtLJ Security: Public

Been fasting all day. Water only. Not even gum. Weigh in competition tomorrow! Kara is beating me!!

Date: 2009-09-16 16:53 Subject: Posted using TxtLJ Security: Public

Had a slimfast. I hate it when i dont have a sitter for the gym. I want to work out.

Date: 2009-09-06 14:55 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

Yesterday, I got really depressed and wrote a journal entry saying "Tomorrow is a new day, tomorrow starts a new week". Then I cut, and went to bed.

Today, I woke up and went to the gym. With my friend. SHe also ran a mile before I came over. But now shes going to a barbeque where she is going to overeat, and I'm staying home.

She's also going back to this guy that uses her for stuff and treats her like crap. Oh, and he's married. She won't get it in her head because she "loves him".

Well, I love myself. Or, at least I'm trying to.

Date: 2009-08-31 23:07 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

blahhhh lame day.

I'm going back to red hair.

woo. I'm so over bleach blonde.

I'm a fat ass

Date: 2009-08-30 21:58 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

Ugh weekends are always blahhhhh. I've been good-- always under 1000 calories. But not perfect. I want to be perfect.

Took laxatives tonight.

Date: 2009-08-29 07:51 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

Yesterday, my mom called me and said she wanted me to go to chinese with her. She was all alone and had a craving. I felt bad, so I said sure.

I had a vegetable broth soup (with sprouts =49)
A vegeterian egg roll (100)
1/4 cup of fried rice (83)
1/4 cup of steamed veggies (37)
5 tbsp soy sauce (34)

Yesterdays total= 302

Then I got chocolate laxatives to keep (just incase) But i really wanted to try trhem so I did. Come 4am, oh boy.I was up all night. This morning, I'm still going at it, which means I weighed in the same as yesterday because all my water weight is still there, but oh well.

Today-- no eating
tonight-- Heather and I are going dancing. We are only allowed one drink and we have to dance our asses off. I want to go to the gym first.

Date: 2009-08-28 16:13 Subject: Posted using TxtLJ Security: Public

still no food today. No hunger pains!! Working out again at 6! Success tastes better than food!!!

Date: 2009-08-28 09:36 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

Down another 1.4 pounds.

Fine, I'll tell you guys my weight.

When I started, I was 200. (last weekend)

25th I was 195
26th I was 192
27th I was 190.6
28th I am 189.2

I know these are HUGE numbers and now you know why I hate myself so much.

But I can see it all peeling off and I'm very excited for the weeks to come.

Date: 2009-08-27 22:20 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

Well I burned 500 on the machines at the gym plus 20 min or so of crunches, etc. So I'm guessing around 600. SOOOOOOO not enough to burn my horrible day, but oh well.

My friend is standing me up for a guy AGAIN. She always does this. We've been friends since 2001 and whenever she is going great with a guy, its bye bye Lauren. Tuesdays and Thursdays are supposed to be OUR workout days but hey, if she's not serious, thats her loss. I'm not coming over at midnight to workout. (even though I probably should tonight)

I secretly compete against her with food intake and gym time. As much as I want to go over there and I want to see her do well, if she is going to give it up for a guy (thats marrie dby the way) then oh well!


Ok so sometimes when I eat (and don't even take laxatives) my body just automatically has that effect, and its weird. lol

Ok I better be at least a pound lighter tomorrow. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

Date: 2009-08-27 19:51 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

But at least it wasnt popcorn. 700+ calories. Even though I could have had popcorn and still turned out the same. EWW

Date: 2009-08-27 19:41 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

FUCK FUCK FUCK

I went to the movies and decided to have swedish fish. 10 calories a piece. I had 14. Ok, Ok, not bad, I guess.

But then we got pretzel bites. I had 8 and a bit of cheese to dip. This is where I go downhill.

Total for today is 721 calories. I'm going to the gym for 2 hours, then going to work out at heathers, then shitting my life away with laxatives tonight.

I hate myself.

Why do I do this? I could have stopped after sweidh fucking fish.

Date: 2009-08-27 11:29 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

Went next door to get a diet coke. I decided to get a side salad. Shredded lettuce with 4 tomato slices.

I bring it back to work to eat, have 2 bites of lettuce and 1 tsp of dressing and I'm full and mad at myself.

Thats it for the day.

Best part is? Everyone thinks I just had a salad.